Sometimes I feel like I am trying to do all this "fun" stuff for or with the boys and they could care less.
Maybe I am just venting. Or maybe I am wanting to know if my kids are the only ones that last about 10 seconds on one activity and then get bored.
I took the boys and some friends HERE to pick blackberries. I thought, what a fun life experience and they love berries. Two minutes in they were done. That is even counting the time they were sitting in the hayride to get there. Complaining, whining, wanting to go already.
Then I pulled out our bag of busy bag activities (which if you want to be a part of mine, go HERE, although this post may not encourage you to do so!) They had FIVE activities and were done playing in less than 10 minutes. I actually forced them to complete one whole game of bingo. They were not happy.
I then saw an idea HERE (hers is WAY cool, check it out) to make an obstacle course with pool noodles and stuff like that. Her boys played with it for over thirty minutes. Mine both went through it twice. Then asked for a snack...
So. My dilemma. Do I force my kids to keep doing an activity after they are done with it? Do I just stop trying to do this fun stuff? Or is it normal?
6 comments:
We pick berries every year....so Jordan has started to look forward to it. We do a lot of activities but it has always been really important to me for Jordan to be able to have fun on his own...use his imagination and entertain himself. I don't think forcing them to do activities (unless maybe it's school or something else) helps anyone out....but I could be wrong!
I love this post cousin. I have a very hard time keeping both kids entertained and fine myself exhausted and frustrated when I'm trying to "be a good mommy" and help them learn and it doesnt' work out. Both kids have a very short attention span for anything planned and seem to last a long time with something they have come up with (by raiding my crafts closet.) I feel like as long as I'm encouraging them to do something else but on their own or I play along, that's good too. "if you dont want to do this, you can go find 1 other thing to do but you need to do it until the timer goes off." Emily responds really well to stuff being timed. DEF dont compare your kiddos or you'll just get frustrated. I do that too. My $.02 are its COMPLETELY NORMAL!
mk
I think it's one of those things where you find the balance. If YOU like planning and doing activities, keep doing it, and just realize your kids will be done quickly. If it's a pain for you, then STOP. Some moms I know won't even play with their kids because they feel it's important for the kids to do independent play. Some moms plan every second. I don't know that there's a right or wrong. There is only the truth that your child probably will have about five minutes' attention span for most things, so go in with low expectations!
I think it is important to schedule activities for our kiddos and be intentionally teaching and training them, but sometimes we have expectations of the outcomes of our toil, and we are extremely impacted when our expectations go unmet. For example, how many times when opening a gift does the small child toss aside the actual gift and play with the ribbons, paper, and box instead? As adults, we are mortified by this, but the question is why? If my child spends an hour in imaginative play with a cardboard box, I should rejoice. He will likely be interested in the toy at some point, but even if he isn't it is okay. If he cares not for the elaborate activity which I creatively and laboriously crafted, fully expecting a particular outcome, I sit back (after frustration fades, btw) and ask myself why? There is a time and place to require attention and completion if that is your aim in that activity, but I'd ask myself what was my goal in the failed activity (perceived failure based on my expectations) and why am I frustrated??? My hubs has taught me that when my buttons or pushed or I feel anger or frustration, it probably points to an idol in my life. And oh, girl, do I have loads of idols when it comes to my children. God is knocking them out from under me left and right these days!!!
So normal, especially for boys. I make mine have quite time reading alone if they don't want to do the activity I have provided - lol.
ha! This made me laugh when I read about your boys not being super excited about something you wanted to do. I have days like that too - sometimes I'm the one in a grouchy mood and other times it's the kids. I think the kids just need more time to mature. I don't run into quite as many of those days....Come to think of it, I haven't had any since we moved to Alaska. So, the obvious solution is you and Blaine need to move here. Someplace cooler and prettier:)
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